May 28, 2010

May 25, 2010

something to think about

I've been thinking a lot about words. I'm not a writer. I have a hard time saying what I mean with words. It takes me a long time to work it out. Here's the thing though, just saying something, or writing something isn't enough. I think I've hid behind words for a long time now. My sister once said this thing that really struck me. It was about reading which we both love to do. She was commenting on someone we both love saying how they only live their life through the books they read. It never occurred to me that reading could be a way of hiding or avoiding life. I do a lot of reading when I can. I do a lot of hiding, too. I think it's time to stop. I'm wondering, if I put the words out there,maybe I can't hide anymore. Will writing it down make me stop hiding or if by writing it down, am I still hiding and not DOING? And how, after living a life with so much fear, do you stop?
I think you just do. Stop.


May 19, 2010

May 11, 2010

May 8, 2010

Right, so last week was little j and this week I got hit. Bad, crazy flu with a 3 day fever, insomnia
(which I NEVER get), crazy ongoing revelations/ hallucinations, dehydration, you name it. I'm better today although still pretty weak and exhausted. Oh and it's the first day of our craftstand! I'm trying to pull it together and muster up the energy for a really good day but man, this has been hard! I know once I get there I'll feel better, especially after I take massive doses of non-drowsy give-me-all-you-got medicine. I don't usually take the stuff because I want the fever to do it's job but enough is enough.
Rain has stopped.
I'll keep you posted......

May 2, 2010

bad weekend

The demons came to visit in the form of a horrible cold. Little j was house bound for almost 5 days which meant we were, too. And tonight, because he was feeling a little better, he did not go to sleep until 9:15. I can't believe I still have hair on my head.